On his News.com blog of January 16th, 2008, Jack Marx composed a prayer apologising for everything Australians have ever done to everyone ever.
I decided, in response, to compose a “Sorry” song to the tune of Tex Williams’ “Smoke, Smoke, Smoke (That Cigarette)” ...
Now we're a country with a heart of gold,
Or at least that's what we're taught and told,
The kinda place that's the envy of the world.
But there's some things that ain't too thrillin'
Like rape and murder an' pillage an' killin'
That when I heard about, did make my toes fair curl.
We're very sorry for Pauline Hanson,
She can't sing and she's shit at dancin'
She ain't much superior to anyone.
Sorry for whingin' and fallin' to our knees
Every time we see some Sudanese,
We promise we'll stop runnin' for our guns.
(CHORUS)
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sincere regrets,
Sorry for all the things we've done, and the things we ain't done yet.
We're so sorry it makes us cry,
Sorry 'bout all these fuckin' flies,
Sorry for the drought and the whales and the heat and the rain and the wet.
John Laws is sorry for his fuckin' language,
Sorry ol' bugger oughta choke on a sandwich,
And Derryn Hinch is sorry for his beard.
We're sorry for Amanda Vanstone,
On behalf of all our unborn grandsons,
And all those foreign folks that we've made a'feared.
We're sorry for Dicko, Mark and Marcia
Can't Cathy Freeman run any faster?
Sorry 'bout that, but we'll see what we can do.
And we're sorry 'bout Kylie Minogue
And Dannii and Delta and Australian Vogue
We're very sorry for everything we've put you through.
(CHORUS)
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sincere regrets,
Sorry for all the things we've done, and the things we ain't done yet.
We're so sorry it makes us cry,
Sorry 'bout all these fuckin' flies,
Sorry for the drought and the whales and the heat and the rain and the wet.
Now I saw a show that weren't quite right
“A Current Affair” or “Today Tonight”
And afterwards I was sorry that I had.
They'd chained some old gal to a wall,
And it turned out it weren't true at all,
T'were enough to make a sane man mad.
And a long time ago I was a bit of a boozer,
Some folks called me the biggest loser,
But we gave the world the technicolour yawn,
So on behalf of all drunken Australians,
It needs to be said if our souls are for savin'
We're so sorry that we pissed on your front lawn.
(REPEAT CHORUS)
From 1995, Asleep At The Wheel "Smoke, Smoke, Smoke (That Cigarette)"
I decided, in response, to compose a “Sorry” song to the tune of Tex Williams’ “Smoke, Smoke, Smoke (That Cigarette)” ...
Now we're a country with a heart of gold,
Or at least that's what we're taught and told,
The kinda place that's the envy of the world.
But there's some things that ain't too thrillin'
Like rape and murder an' pillage an' killin'
That when I heard about, did make my toes fair curl.
We're very sorry for Pauline Hanson,
She can't sing and she's shit at dancin'
She ain't much superior to anyone.
Sorry for whingin' and fallin' to our knees
Every time we see some Sudanese,
We promise we'll stop runnin' for our guns.
(CHORUS)
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sincere regrets,
Sorry for all the things we've done, and the things we ain't done yet.
We're so sorry it makes us cry,
Sorry 'bout all these fuckin' flies,
Sorry for the drought and the whales and the heat and the rain and the wet.
John Laws is sorry for his fuckin' language,
Sorry ol' bugger oughta choke on a sandwich,
And Derryn Hinch is sorry for his beard.
We're sorry for Amanda Vanstone,
On behalf of all our unborn grandsons,
And all those foreign folks that we've made a'feared.
We're sorry for Dicko, Mark and Marcia
Can't Cathy Freeman run any faster?
Sorry 'bout that, but we'll see what we can do.
And we're sorry 'bout Kylie Minogue
And Dannii and Delta and Australian Vogue
We're very sorry for everything we've put you through.
(CHORUS)
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sincere regrets,
Sorry for all the things we've done, and the things we ain't done yet.
We're so sorry it makes us cry,
Sorry 'bout all these fuckin' flies,
Sorry for the drought and the whales and the heat and the rain and the wet.
Now I saw a show that weren't quite right
“A Current Affair” or “Today Tonight”
And afterwards I was sorry that I had.
They'd chained some old gal to a wall,
And it turned out it weren't true at all,
T'were enough to make a sane man mad.
And a long time ago I was a bit of a boozer,
Some folks called me the biggest loser,
But we gave the world the technicolour yawn,
So on behalf of all drunken Australians,
It needs to be said if our souls are for savin'
We're so sorry that we pissed on your front lawn.
(REPEAT CHORUS)
From 1995, Asleep At The Wheel "Smoke, Smoke, Smoke (That Cigarette)"
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