Wednesday, 21 May 2008


What does this look like to you? ...

I thought I was looking at the internal organs of some strange-looking deep sea critter. Or a preserved fur-ball from ye olden times. Apparently, it’s food ...

A chef with three Michelin stars has created a schism in Spanish cuisine by labelling avant-garde creations that revolutionised cooking "pretentious".

Restaurants like culinary superstar Ferran Adria's El Bulli near Barcelona, the world's best according to Restaurant Magazine, have dumped traditional kitchen techniques in favour of high-tech creations distilling flavours into foams and gels ...

If I wanted to eat "foams" and "gels", I'd save myself a fortune, stay home and swallow my own toothpaste and chow down on some shaving cream.

... The menu of Can Fabes features dishes such as suckling pig served with lobster and lamb with figs, compared to El Bulli offerings like Rabbit Ear Crunchy and Hare Juice with Apple Jelly-Cru and Black Currant Marinated Gorgonzola Shell.

Rabbit Ear Crunchy? Hare Juice? HARE JUICE!?

Crunchy Frog, anyone? Ram's Bladder Cup with Lark's Vomit? Cockroach Cluster? Anthrax Ripple?

Ferran Adria should be bashed to death with a gorgonzola shell. Full of concrete. Wanker.

Hare Juice. Fuck off.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What does it look like? It looks like a middle ages chastity lock made from mashed turnip and whey.