Friday, 18 April 2008


From the Sydney Morning Herald’s letters page of April 18, 2008* ...

“The Prime Minister must give serious consideration to the issue of obesity at the 2020 Summit.

Every area of national interest identified will be seriously affected by Australia's exponential weight gain. Unless obesity is addressed, the FUTURE IS GRIM.

In the period since the Government took office, Australians have gained 2.4 million kilos between them. Along with this weight gain has come DISEASE AND DISABILITY, as well as PERSONAL AND SOCIETAL TRAUMA.

By 2020 we will have amassed an additional 100 million unwanted kilos and the obesity EPIDEMIC will be BITING DEEPLY INTO EVERY ASPECT OF NATIONAL LIFE.

Obesity has a DEVASTATING EFFECT ON THE ECONOMY, with Access Economics identifying it as responsible for ANNUAL LOSSES OF $21 BILLION. New patterns of disease are already AFFECTING PRODUCTIVITY.

Obesity will DRAIN THE HEALTH BUDGET as more people suffer from obesity-related CHRONIC DISEASES. Infrastructure is already affected, as hospital beds and ambulances are replaced to cope with bigger patients. CITIES WILL NEED TO BE REDESIGNED to promote health.

OBESITY AFFECTS CLIMATE CHANGE, as moving heavier people consumes larger quantities of fuel. It affects rural, remote and indigenous communities, which are far from treatment centres for CHRONIC DISEASE.

Obesity is one of a group of cardiometabolic RISK factors which, in combination, increase the overall RISK of developing heart DISEASE and type 2 diabetes.

Obesity is also a major contributor to other CHRONIC DISEASES, including arthritis, liver and respiratory disorders and some CANCERS.

Most of these CHRONIC DISEASES are INCURABLE. Obesity, however, is preventable.

The Government must approach the prevention and treatment of obesity as A NATIONAL EMERGENCY with the intensity afforded to smoking, HIV/AIDS and immunisation. Obesity is the tobacco of the modern age and this is A BATTLE AUSTRALIA CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE.”

Professor Ian Caterson Boden professor of human nutrition, University of Sydney; Professor Stephen Colagiuri professor of metabolic health, University of Sydney; Professor Mark Nelson Chair, discipline of general practice, University of Tasmania; Professor Paul Zimmet director of the International Diabetes Institute.

GASP! ... Hnnnng! ... hnnng! ... HEAVE! ... gasp, gasp, gasp ... HEAVE! ... Ung! .... HEAVE! Gasp, gasp, gasp ... Erk! ... hnng! ... huk! ... unkg! ...





Heave ... gasp ... hngkngkkkkkerung ...


Who’s got the ammunition?!! Huh?! HUH!?

We’ll need ammunition, GOD DAMN IT!!!! And guns!!! Lots and LOTS of guns!!!

And a prayer book!! Don’t forget the prayer book!! ...

Oh-oh, say can you see, by the dawn’s early light
What so proudly we hailed at the
Twilight’s Last Gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the Perilous Fight,
Oér the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?
And the Rocket’s Red Glare, the Bombs Bursting in Air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O’er the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave ...

Doo-be-do, be do-be-do-do, do-do doobie do do, dah DAH, DAH-DAH-DAH-DAH ...

Dah-da-daaaaaaaa, da-da!

Fuck, I’m hungry.

(* My emphases and bolding added for extra weight)


Anonymous said...

ross you are fucking hilarious.

Ross Sharp said...

Thank you, Anonymous person.

Anonymous said...

my pleasure. can't wait for more... you should have your own tv show as well.